Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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