strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Randomize
