Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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