i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He did a backflip because drugs
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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