Dual....:-)
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
