Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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