Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize