He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
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