No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
you made out with another girl for some wings
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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