Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize