The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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