PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
