I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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