they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
