That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
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