He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
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