i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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