I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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