if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
