What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
