he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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