woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
