We're like a lot better than the average bears
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
