I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
