he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
