Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
