i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
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