Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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