Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
