Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
