I can't watch pbs sober anymore
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
