She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I enjoy the company of your penis
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
