They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I just had sex on a roof
i now understand why vodka
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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