The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
