Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize