I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
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had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
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Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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