she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
