you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
