Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight