East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket