what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I looked at my own cervix.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize