the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Life without a bra equals bliss.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
