I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
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