When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
