he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
