when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
