I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Randomize
