cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
