My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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