is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
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she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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