I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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